This One Goes Out To You
My husband put this reminder in my iPhone on October 19th of last year. I will tell you why this is so meaningful today.
At the time, I was working for an advertising agency as a graphic designer. In August, I found out that my position would no longer exist, effective November 2012.
From August until November, I felt bitter, resentful and miserable. Everyday seemed pointless as time slowly ticked away towards my nonexistent job. I began to feel strongly that I could not repeat this process by jumping to another advertising agency. Know that this wasn’t my first ad agency layoff. I’d been through one in 2008 as well.
So, everyday after work, I would sit in my husband’s office, continuing to work on my company-issued laptop, and basically just complain.
I would tell him how I felt like I was lying every time I applied for graphic design jobs. That I wished I could be one of those people that said they loved what they did, but I wasn’t.
That in the last few months, I had determined that the only thing that I never grew burnt out on, tired of or frustrated with was makeup. I read a quote once that what you spend time doing while avoiding your real work is what you should really be doing in life. If that is true, it was makeup for me. I would spend hours researching makeup products, techniques, reviews. I would do elaborate looks at night, only to wash them off and go to bed, simply because I enjoyed the process so much. I knew it wasn’t a “real” job option, but it was the only thing I loved and fantasized about that way. This wasn’t coming out of nowhere of course. I have always loved makeup and just being creative in general. When I was young, I took private art lessons, went to art camp and went on to study art in college.
My husband guaranteed me that if I pursued what I really loved, I’d be amazed how different my life would be in a year, prompting the reminder above.
So when I was losing my job, a job that I didn’t even really like, I decided that this was as good of a time as any to just do something I truly loved. I knew I loved to talk about makeup and encourage other women and I often thought about how cool it would be to work for a company you were a huge fan of. So I chose Sephora. A place that made me feel calm and excited at the same time, that smelled nice and made me feel like I was in my element. I could get experience, knowledge and be surrounded by things I never had to fake enthusiasm for.
Around that time, I also began this blog. I badly needed to put my makeup ideas and excitement somewhere, anywhere! I have always liked to write and I knew that when it was about a subject I couldn’t get enough of, it would be enjoyable.
And boy has it been.
I needed this blog in the worst way. It was mine, no one was taking it from me or directing me. I was going to write, film, photograph and create this content whether anyone read it or not. But the miraculous thing is that you did read it. You kept reading and here I am, 1 full year later, and I cannot express to you just how much personal fulfillment and genuine satisfaction and validation Wake Up For Makeup has given me. None of this would have happened if you weren’t here, reading, just like you are right now. I know it’s easy to say thank you, but through a computer screen it’s hard to tell you just how grateful I am that you care to read what I care about.
I have learned what it feels like to work harder than ever before at building something all on your own. I have learned that I wasn’t meant to just be a graphic designer and every failed interview, layoff or unhappiness I felt was just an indicator of that. I had a voice inside of me a lot of the time actually that screamed out “this is wrong for you!” I was meant to do this.
So, one year since my husband put that reminder in my phone, I can tell you that my life is infinitely better. I could have never, ever have dreamt all that has happened in the last year. The opportunities and people I’ve encountered simply because I began creating content to express my love for makeup. Funny how all the pieces seem to fall into place when you finally pursue what is right.
Although I am here celebrating Wake Up For Makeup’s 1st birthday, I celebrate you more. You who reads my posts, laughs at my ridiculous pictures, asks me how to do a certain technique or my thoughts on a particular product. Thank you so much for coming back for more. I will continue to wake up for makeup and I hope you’ll keep doing it with me!